Awkward! Story telling is everywhere. Parenting. Stop waiting. Chances are astronomically small. Just do something. Acting in real life.
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1. “Are they about to hug, kiss or shake hands?”
Make It Awkward! – Alexandra Plakias – (Aeon)
An examination of what “awkwardness” is, and perhaps is not. We tend to think of awkwardness as something we are, but Plakias shifts perspective to awkward situations. And that’s a reflection of society.
Awkwardness alerts us to the fact that our social norms are under construction. It’s an opportunity to examine the work that goes into our social lives, and why that work so often remains invisible.
I’m not sure I buy into it quite as deeply as Plakias would take us, but it’s definitely an interesting perspective, particularly for those of us who frequently feel awkward (which is almost all of us).
Do this: Examine the awkwardness.
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2. “More fiction has been written in Excel than in Word.”
Every forecast takes a number from today and multiplies it by a story about tomorrow. – Morgan Housel – (CollabFund)
A fact is a fact. A prediction is a story. A story that, by definition, cannot be 100% true.
While Housel’s perspective comes primarily from finance (hence the Excel quip), the article applies to life in general.
The most persuasive stories are what you want to believe are true.
This implies anyone who wants their prediction of the future — their story — to be met with approval needs to craft it to meet what the intended audience already wants to be true.
Sounds all too familiar these days.
Do this: Pay attention to the story.
3. “We need to do a better job supporting parents.”
Parents are stressed! – Jacqueline Nesi, PhD – (TechnoSapiens)
It’s not that parents haven’t always been stressed, it’s that they’re facing more and more stressors than ever before. Social media, isolation, and mental health might be the newest at the top of the list, along with age-old stressors like time and finances.
The article is partly in response to the Surgeon General’s recent advisory on the effects of all that stress on parents. That statement includes:
“Something has to change. It begins with fundamentally shifting how we value parenting, recognizing that the work of raising a child is crucial to the health and well-being of all society.”
Again, I don’t think this is anything new. The increased focus, albeit because of the increased stressors, is long overdue.
Do this: Support your local parent.
4. “It’s time to stop waiting and start doing.”
Life is Not a Spectator Sport – Joshua Becker – (Becoming Minimalist)
This short but powerful essay drives home the point that we, and only we, are responsible for making changes in our lives, and for instigating the change we want to see in the world.
This statistic blew me away:
55% of people say that ‘wrongs committed against me’ are holding them back from achieving the future they’d like to have.
That’s not to say there aren’t situations where people are being held back, but a significant portion of that 55% have simply given away their agency to someone, or something, else. How incredibly sad.
Do this: Don’t wait.
5. “Wonder at existence”
The most profound wonder is stirred by what is most ordinary – Maria Balaska – (Psyche)
The odds of you or I existing are (literally?) astronomically small. That the sequence of events leading to our existing began at the big bang and ended up here is absolutely amazing.
And yet we rarely consider it.
… our lives are saturated with meaning. Although this can go unnoticed most of the time.
Unnoticed is part of it. Missing the wonder of it all is, perhaps, the biggest lost opportunity of our lives.
Do this: Go for a walk. Wonder.
6. “The willingness to just do something”
On actually doing things – Oliver Burkeman – (The Imperfectionist)
Some of us spend more time making plans to do things than we spend actually doing the thing. If we even ever get around to it. We’re looking for systems, and habits, and routines, and who-knows-what else. The thinking is that once those things are in place, we can do the thing, and be guaranteed of some success. Of course, we never finish our preparation or dreaming, and we never do the thing.
Burkeman proposes an alternative:
You pick something you genuinely care about, and then, for at least a few minutes – a quarter of an hour, say – you do some of it.
To me this is nothing more than dealing with what some call “activation energy”. Sometimes starting — doing — is the hardest thing of all, but once overcome, continuing is not just easier, but sometimes even automatic.
Do this: Do (some of) the thing.
7. “The power of operating dissociatively”
“I am an actor playing a role” – Chris Guillebeau – (A Year of Mental Health)
This is common advice for public speaking: imagine that you are an actor playing the role of someone who’s a confident public speaker. It’s surprisingly effective.
But the concept applies to more.
A performance is not only when you stand on a stage in front of an audience. In fact, many parts of life consist of recurring performances: meetings, conversations, interactions, and so on.
Stepping outside of yourself is a useful approach to doing things the “real” you might not feel ready, or even interested, in doing.
Do this: Act.
Other things that caught my eye
What I’m reading
In progress:
- Foundation and Earth – Isaac Asimov
- How to Read a Book – Mortimer J. Adler, Charles Van Doren
- Where Good Ideas Come From – Steven Johnson (re-read)
- Thinking, Fast and Slow – Daniel Kahneman (audio)
Daily:
- A Calendar of Wisdom: Daily Thoughts to Nourish the Soul, Written and Selected from the World’s Sacred Texts – Leo Tolstoy
A full list of my common sources is on the sources page, and I list the books I’ve read on my Reading List page.
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Thanks!
-Leo