Lighten up. Personal entitlement. One day at a time. Genius ≠ asshole. Boredom vs. change. Lasting 6 minutes. You might be wrong.
The two most powerful warriors are patience and time.
– Leo Tolstoy
1. “Admit that you have a problem.”
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff and It’s All Small Stuff – Richard Carlson – (ebook)
The full quote, in a chapter titled “Lighten Up”:
The first step in recovering from overseriousness is to admit that you have a problem.
What grabbed my attention is that this simple act, admitting you have a problem, is the first step of any personal change. Think of any aspect of your personality you’d like to improve: you need to recognize it first. Think of some way you’d love to see someone else change: they won’t until or unless they see it as a problem first.
Self-awareness and introspection are key.
Do this: Reflect.
#self-awareness #self-improvement
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2. “You are allowed to have a voice and a vision of your own.”
Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear – Elizabeth Gilbert – (ebook)
Naturally, Gi lbert’s context is about being creative, something you are entitled to.
I recognize that the word entitlement has dreadfully negative connotations, but I’d like to appropriate it here and put it to good use, because you will never be able to create anything interesting out of your life if you don’t believe that you’re entitled to at least try.
This entitlement should extend further, beyond just being creative. You’re entitled to think your own thoughts. You’re entitled to have an opinion. You’re entitled to live your own life, not someone else’s. You’re entitled to be you.
Unfortunately it’s all too often easiest to just follow the crowd. Perhaps entitlement is also a responsibility.
Do this: Think and do for yourself.
3. “Focus on the 24 hours”
Aging into the Zero Percentile – Fran Moreland Johns – (Blog)
This caught my attention mostly because I’d also published on the same topic earlier this week: Last Man Standing. Even though I’m significantly younger than Ms. Johns, comparisons to the populations around us and the company we keep are inevitable.
She shared a site with interesting information. For example, plugging in my birth year, the planet’s population has not-quite tripled since I was born, 44% of those born the same year are no longer with us, and 88% of the planet is younger than I am. Fascinating and frightening all at the same time.
Perhaps the only answer is to ignore wherever we are on the percentage scale and focus on the 24 hours. Aim to do the right things, …. Seek justice. Do a little good somewhere. Love your neighbor.
I think the phrase is “one day at a time”.
Do this: Do a little good.
4. “Excellence doesn’t require abuse.”
Stop Conflating Genius With Asshole – Joan Westenberg – (Blog)
In some corners it really does seem like the worse you behave, the smarter people think you are. Of course this is playing out on the world stage right now, but in a sense it’s always been thus. Some people, for whatever reason, feel the need to “prove” their genius by being jerks to everyone around them, often with catastrophic results.
Genius doesn’t look like domination. It looks like collaboration. It looks like the humility to know you’re not the smartest person in every room, and the strength to make space for those who are.
For too many people terms like “humility” are signs of weakness. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Do this: Stay humble.
5. “A preference for boredom over surprise”
To Be Happier, Stop Resisting Change (gift link) – Arthur C. Brooks – (The Atlantic)
A really nice write-up on change, and why so many balk at it, often even in its smallest form. Also interesting is the thought that change-resistance may be epigenetic, and thus heritable. Perhaps my greater acceptance of change is, in part, because of the massive changes my parents experienced.
Your resistance to change may well be making you unhappier, because it is positively correlated with neuroticism, a trait that personality research has found to be a driver of unhappiness
The good news is that with both example and specific steps, Brooks includes advice on how to perhaps become slightly more change-accepting.
Do this: Try to resist less.
6. “Using a computer for homework, learners typically last fewer than 6 minutes”
5 Ways to Help Your Brain Learn Better – Jared Cooney Horvath, Ph.D., M.Ed. – (Psychology Today)
Horvath makes several compelling arguments for replacing technology as a primary method to attempt to learn something.
Multitasking is one of the worst things human beings can do for learning and memory.
Computers and related devices are inherently multi-tasking devices. We habitually use them to swap between multiple different tasks constantly. Even when you decide “OK, now I’m going to study…” and focus on that single task, within six minutes you’re very likely elsewhere, or elsewhere-and-back. It’s habitual and takes incredible amounts of mental energy to avoid.
Not so if what you have is a book in your hands.
The essay discusses several approaches to improving learning techniques.
Do this: Learn. Focus. Single-task.
7. “Self-doubt is key to critical thinking”
3 brilliant critical thinking tools used by Daniel Dennett – (Big Think)
Honestly, this seems to define our times.
A lot of people just dig in, double down, and refuse to abandon a point of view which is under attack from their critics.
The thing is, this applies to both sides of almost any issue. It feels like people are more attached to their positions and opinions than ever before.
Dennett discusses simple concepts to help us do better: “Occam’s Razor”, “Occam’s Broom”, and the “Socratic method”. The second was new to me.
Occam’s broom is used to describe people’s tendency to sweep relevant facts “under the rug.”
The problem, of course, is that people first need to admit there’s a problem before they’ll consider using these tools.
Do this: Consider that you might be wrong, and use the tools.
Random links
- You’ve heard of radio.garden (streaming radio from around the planet), now there’s tv.garden.
- The Panicked Voice on the Phone Sounded Like Her Daughter. It Wasn’t. – A topic perhaps more suited for the day job, but this needs wider distribution. Wall Street Journal gift link.
What I’m reading now
- Bullets and Beads – Jana DeLeon
- Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear – Elizabeth Gilbert (re-read)
- Don’t Believe Everything You Think: Why Your Thinking Is The Beginning & End Of Suffering – Joseph Nguyen
My Reading List – everything I’ve read since 2021.
My Sources Page – the common sources I scan/read regularly.
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It always amazes me when someone or something comes into my life at a time of crisis. I am older than you Leo, and your balanced wide knowledge is very much apprecisted. I dont read social media so finding your ‘place’ is a breath of fresh air in this crazy world.