Hiatus explained. People are awesome. Amazing serendipity. Taking a break. Even sucky meditation helps. Staying in touch. Choosing family.
And you may ask yourself
“Well … how did I get here?”
– Talking Heads
This issue of 7 Takeaways is 100% personal. The takeaways I’m sharing are the result of my fall and emergency surgery the day before last Thanksgiving (the reason for the extended hiatus). As you can imagine, there was a lot to process and think about, and that’s been part of my “therapy” since.
So, at the risk of excessive hubris, taking myself too seriously, and that anyone might even care, I want to return from my hiatus with a 7 Takeaways of my own.
1. “Where have you been?”
Do this: Watch your step.
Support 7 Takeaways
(Or just forward this to a friend; that helps too.)
2. “Have you met people?”
It’s common these days to be cynical when talking about people in general. “Have you met people?” is a common comment that reflects the negative perception so prevalent right now.
I’ve met people. People are awesome. No, not all people, but the chosen collection of family, friends, and acquaintances I’ve somehow managed to surround myself with have been absolutely nothing short of amazing.
This might be the single biggest takeaway of them all. I remain floored at the number of people we heard from, the number of people who stepped up, and just the number of people who cared.
Do this: Embrace (literally and otherwise) the people in your life.
3. “A series of fortunate events”
I’ve characterized my story as one thing gone very, very wrong, followed by an incredible sequence of things going right.
- the first responders
- the friends and family
- the right hospital
- the right surgeon
- the surgery itself
- the after-care
- the better-than-expected progress
There’s probably more, but quite seriously, aside from the One Bad Thing (the fall itself), I was very, very fortunate to be on the receiving end of many, many things just working and going right, one after another.
Do this: Notice what’s going right, even in the darkest of times.
4. “I’m electing to embrace the fallow time”
Given that my recovery process is proceeding faster than I anticipated, for which I’m incredibly grateful, of course, this presents a dilemma: I could restart the machine faster than expected. I could “go back to work”, so to speak, sooner rather than later.
It’s tempting, but even if technically I could spin up the machine once again and return to status normal, I elect not to do so. This very post, for example, could have been made last month. But instead, I’m electing to take the time, to use the time, to continue to catch my breath, think about things, and do a more thorough reset.
The “stake in the ground” I’m using is my neck brace (cervical collar). Even though it has no bearing on 7 Takeaways or Not All News is Bad, it, along with a well-needed haircut, is something that drives my ability (or at least comfort) in getting back in front of the camera for Ask Leo!. So I’ll use it for all.
If you’re reading this, the collar’s off. 
Do this: Don’t be afraid to take a break.
5. “Present Moment, Wonderful Moment.”
Meaningful Yet Mediocre Meditation
I suck at meditation. I don’t let that get in the way of doing it poorly, anyway, for the past 17+ years. My take is that the only truly “bad” meditation is the one that didn’t happen.
It’s interesting to me that my poor meditation practice helped in multiple ways and in multiple situations. From a half hour in an MRI(!) to just maintaining peace of mind while in a lengthy hospital stay, meditation helped.
Do this: Don’t let your perception of what meditation “should” be prevent you from embracing what it can be.
6. “Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help”
This might be my one disappointment out of all this. I continue to be amazed at the number of people who’ve reached out, especially initially. It’s been very moving.
The next time you find yourself wondering what to do for that friend who’s been through something, or is just having a rough time, the simplest answer may be the best….
Drop ’em a line.
When some have asked what they can do to help, my response has often been “stay in touch”, or “keep me in the loop”.
Which then doesn’t happen. Silence.
I try very hard not to take it personally, since I know everyone has a life and struggles of their own. And yet, staying in touch seems like such a low-effort thing, I can’t help but wonder.
Some do, of course. And I’m truly grateful. I’m just … disappointed, I guess, at some of the others.
Do this: Stay in touch.
7. “Just as you can choose to exclude, you can choose to include”
Yes, you can choose your friends and acquaintances, as you always have, I’m sure. But there’s something significant when some cross the threshold into the category of “family”.
It’s something significant I wish I’d learned to embrace sooner.
I’ve often heard the term “the family you chose” as a kind of negative reaction to the family you’re born into, particularly when that biological relationship has significant problems.
The reality is that it need not be a negative reaction at all. Regardless of your biological origins, the family you choose throughout your life can make it so much richer. It’s something well worth embracing.
Do this: Embrace your family-by-choice.
Random links
- Amy Tan: How Not To Fall (Facebook, but an account is NOT required – decline/close all prompts that ask you to.)
What I’m reading now
- Right Thing, Right Now: Good Values. Good Character. Good Deeds. – Ryan Holiday
- F**k You Optimism – A User’s Guide to Optimism with Teeth – Joan Westenberg
- The Nature of Things – Lucretius
My Reading List – everything I’ve read since 2021.
My Sources Page – the common sources I scan/read regularly.
Support 7 Takeaways
Your support helps keep 7 Takeaways viable. I appreciate your consideration VERY much. I have options for recurring Support (Monthly/Quarterly/Yearly options) as well as one-time support over in The Ask Leo! (my “day job”) store. Purchasing any of the books using the links on my Reading List also helps.
Another thing that really helps is sharing 7 Takeaways with a friend. Just forward this email on. And if you received this email from a friend, you can subscribe at 7takeaways.com to get your own copy every Sunday.
Thanks!
If you’re having difficulty viewing this email, visit 7takeaways.com/latest.
If a link to a source above leads you to a paywall, please read my note on paywalls.
Some links above may be affiliate links.
If someone forwarded you this email, subscribe at 7takeaways.com.
Nice to have you back even if its at 90%. Life surprises like yours are really life altering and can result in more positives than negatives. I am 88 and have found out that focusing on the positives gives big rewards. Thank you for all you do.
good article